Who is the boss here?
As you probably know, at home, I am a woman surrounded by men and boys. I am married to a wonderful man, I have two fantastic sons and we have an adorable male dog. Most days it is not a big deal. Some days it is crazy weird. Many things kinda confuse me about men and boys. What has been perplexing me lately, is the idea of who is the boss in the house. All this time I thought I was in charge. I pay the bills, I am the “go to” person for permission, I bring home some bacon (more like bacos, but still), and I thought I was the boss but I am worried I am in complete denial that I have ANY control in my home.
Number one, my husband and my boys don’t seem to care that I do not want urine soaked toilet seats, floors, or walls. Urinating is not a sport for me and I do not think it should be for boys either. I have screamed, punished and threatened my boys yet not much has changed. I ask that they either lift the seat or aim REALLY well! Is that too much? Should a boss have to repeat such basic information. Flushing seems to be beyond their control also! Some days when I enter one of my bathrooms at home, I feel like I AM entering the men’s restroom at Wal-Mart because it looks and smells like it! If you are asking how I know what Wal-Mart’s mens restroom smells and looks like, it is because, one day, when Jesse was very little, I had to run into one! He accidently went into one and got scared and screamed bloody murder. Without a thought, I ran in, looked around in disgust, held my breath, grabbed Jesse, and ran out. I’m still scarred. I am not over it.
Secondly, I looked around today and I realized I have lost control of my home – kinda. Chuck was playing with my iPhone and using one of the MANY apps he has purchased for his enjoyment ON MY PHONE. He is 7! Jesse was playing 70’s classic rock through computer speakers attached to MY computer. Don’t ask why he is into classic rock. There is NO REASONABLE EXPLANATION. All the while he danced round the house, music blared, as I futilely tried to make a doctor’s appointment for myself that was 4 years past due!
Sadly, not even my trusty male dog treats me like the “master” I should be. This dog insists on being in my lap or being held. I can’t just let him out to go to relieve himself. No, that would be too normal! Leroy doesn’t like tall grass (or grass of any length) so he won’t walk onto the lawn to go to the bathroom. I have to pick him up and place him on the lawn where the grass is its shortest. Yes, obviously, I am not the boss here!
Finally, I try to watch the finale of a new favorite show of my that I DVR’d. A two-hour show with NO COMMERCIALS took me about 3 hours to watch. SOME of the things that happened that diverted my attention from my show are listed below. There are too many to list but you get the idea.
- The dog, Leroy, needed to go out.
- Jesse had a nervous breakdown because he feared Leroy would run off when he went out (the fence gate is broken).
- I try to reassure Jesse that the dog will be okay.
- Do a load of laundry so Chuck has a clean outfit for a birthday party later in the day.
- Jesse and Chuck get in an argument over Lego’s. I have to stop to insure no one is maimed.
- I have to go to the bathroom and notice the toilet is clogged. No, I didn’t do it!
- Do a little plumbing on the clogged toilet.
- Jesse has another nervous breakdown because Chuck wants to go out to play and Jesse needs to be reassured that is safe.
- Spend time to discuss other “issues” Jesse has.
- Make the boys lunch (well it is now 2 p.m.! I suppose this is reasonable).
- Answer a call from my mom about all the plans for tomorrow.
- Answer a call from the Gulf Coast Regional Blood Center for the millionth time this year!!
- Answer the door 5 times for various reasons.
- Chuck has a nervous breakdown about something. I never could figure out what the matter was but I spent a while trying.
- My husband needs help finding his baking sheets, keys, and various other items.
Does all this sound like what a boss has to deal with? I didn’t think so! So, I wonder….Who is the boss here?!