Did someone say sandwich?
After a surreal week, I realized that I may be quickly entering the sandwich generation. You know. The time in your life when you straddle parenthood and taking care of your parents. Currently, I have youngish boys and oldish parents. Granted they are all healthy and happy but I see teenagers and elderly parents on the horizon. It’s weird. It seems like yesterday that I was goofing off in college. I thought I had worries then! Nothing compares to worrying about your kids and your parents at the same time.
I am extremely lucky. My parents are very healthy. They are sprightly and extremely active for their age. Thank God for that. The problem is when they are a little sick or need a routine surgery, it reminds me that they are not getting any younger. My mom just had a rather routine surgery which went relatively well. But when I looked at her after surgery, she looked so old and helpless. I know it was so difficult for her but it was also very difficult for my dad. What is harder to watch, your mom recovering from surgery and looking sad or watching the effect of all that on you dad? That is a tough one because both are brutal.
My boys are also really healthy and doing great BUT they are young! I know it is silly worrying about teenager years when your kids are only 10 and 7 but, I do! I feel like I have my hands full now so how will I handle the tween and teen years? How will I handle these years while helping my parents if and when they may need it? My family is my world and I want to do right by them all. Will I be searching my boys pockets and rooms to make sure they are not using drugs while fighting with my parents trying to get them to take their drugs? Will I be arguing with my youngest about being too young to drive while trying gently to tell my mom or dad that they are too old to drive? Will I be helping my boys get acclimated to their new dorm room as well as get my parents comfortable in their new place in a retirement community? Who knows? I may not have any of those problems simultaneously or ever! I do think about it though.
Sorry for the debbie-downer tone of this but this has been on my mind a lot lately. After writing this (blogs ARE cathartic), I have decided that instead of worrying about the future, I am going t try to just live in the present. My kids will become teenagers and my parents will get old. So what!? They are doing great – better than me! So I am really going to try to let go and just live in the present. By doing that, I can enjoy today and not waste it worrying bout something I cannot control. Right!?
Wish me luck!