Wow! A girl in the house.
I had the pleasure of having my niece, Brooke, visit me for a couple of days this week. She is a beautiful 11-year-old. She has big blue eyes and long, thick blonde hair. Over the last few months she has really changed into a young lady. She dresses impeccably with the appropriate accessories and hairstyle. When she visited, I noticed she was wearing lip gloss and glitter lotion. She even asked me for a razor! I don’t remember shaving at that age but who knows! That was a LONG time ago.
As we hang out for a few days it became very clear that she is a girl on the verge of young adulthood and my boys are flat-out, uncivilized animals. Don’t get me wrong, I love my boys and I know they will become great adults – eventually! But right now, they are so far off from civilized behavior I sometimes worry that no girl will even be able to talk to them much less like them.
When we went ut to dinner with Brooke, she used her napkin, chewed with her mouth closed, and didn’t burp once! My boys never touched their napkin, grossed us out many times with their chewing, and burped and tooted a few times each. She said please and thank you. My boys crawled under the table. She ate her dinner quietly while having a civilized conversation while my boys are loud and silly. She left the restaurant with no ketchup stains, my boys had multiple food remnants on their face and clothes. Chuck was so bad that he left a ketchup mark on my car as he was getting into it ( I noticed it on my car as I was leaving for work. I thought it was dried blood!).
Sure, I see all these things on a daily basis but when you have a well-behaved girl sitting next to your boys, the contrast is sooo great it is incredibly disturbing. It makes a mother worry about how her boys are ever going to be able to be serious and hold down a job, and God help them, get a girl!
Don’t misunderstand me. My boys are wonderful, kind people. They try to be well-behaved. I can see it on their faces when they try to “be good” but I also see the does-not-compute face at the same time. They just don’t get it most of the time. They are good in church. The behave, for the most part, in the presence of company but their everyday behavior is just plain nasty. Like I said, I love them, but the gross me out often!
They don’t care if they smell. Dirty does not bother them. Sweat is just sweat. Who cares if they miss the toilet? They don’t. If more toothpaste ends up on the sink, wall, or floor, than their mouth, it’s no biggie. No need to use a fan when taking care of your business, everyone’s stuff stinks. Sneezing into your hand and then hugging your mom is just plain sweet – to them. They are just so different from girls!
Having a girl in the house made me really look at my boys and frankly, I was concerned. That was until I had a little encounter with Jesse. He was laughing because Brooke was commenting on how gross he was. Instead of seeming offended, Jesse seemed amused. I took him aside and I asked him why that doesn’t bother him. I went into the whole speech about how girl don’t like messy and stinky etc. Jesse just kinda laughed and said, ” Mom, it doesn’t bother me when girls say those things. Boys gross out girls and girls act all grossed-out. It’s what we do. You are an adult. You should know this by now. Boys grow out of most gross stuff but not all of it. Women think its cute that men are a little gross. It makes it interesting. Don’t worry so much Mom.”
He then runs off to terrorize Brooke some more. I watch them in a new light and I realize that Jesse is sooo right. They both are loving it! Once again, Jesse amazes me. I cherish this moment to watch them both grow into little adults. It was awesome and I am glad I was able to step back and look at it from another perspective.
I feel good. My next thought is it is the mothers that get the raw deal. We get the gross little boys and the gross men! Oh well. If I need some civilized conversation for dinner, I will just invite Brooke over.